With the way that gender-typing in toys is only a small part of a larger cultural system of gender-stereotypes, there's no way to deal with this issue with just the wave of a hand. But there are some things that we all can consider when interacting and raising children, whether we're parents, family members, guardians or teachers.
INTRODUCE THEM TO A DIVERSITY OF ROLE MODELS
Aspirations are incredibly important for kids to work towards, and role models provide them someone to look up to. But in many fields prominent figures tend to be men due to the historical disenfranchisement of women and their contributions. Take the time to research and introduce diverse roles models to teach that anyone is capable of great things!
GIVE THEM ALL THE OPTIONS FOR TOYS, CLOTHES, & COLOURS!
It may be unintuitive, but try not to label items as ‘for girls’ or ‘for boys’. Instead, let go of associations and restrictions, and open your child to a world of choice dictated not by societal pressure, but by their individual needs and interests.
MODEL EGALITARIAN RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN ALL PEOPLE
Be conscious of the way you interact with others, especially with those of the opposite or other genders. Whether it is with your peers or your partner, show that men and women can be close friends, work together and engage as equals. Modelling relationships where all parties treat each other with equal respect allows your child to apply these values to how they treat others in the future.
ENCOURAGE PHYSICAL
PLAY & EXPRESSION
It’s a common misconception that only boys enjoy rough-housing or being rowdy. Are they really more naturally inclined to play like that, or is it because it’s more socially permissible for boys to be physically active? Let all children experiment with their physical play and expression, and let them see where their bodies can take them and what they're capable of.
FACILITATE EMOTIONAL EXPRESSION
Talk to your child about their feelings and let them express them. This allows them to recognise different feelings and express them in healthier ways in the future.
This also lets them empathise with others, facilitating their emotional growth and openness, and cultivating better relationships.
TEACH THEM THE VALUE OF DOMESTIC WORK
All too often are women assumed to be the domestic caretakers of the household in media and cultural expectations. Instead, teach your children to do the laundry, wash the dishes and cook together with you or your partner. Apart from spending more time with each other, this imparts the importance and value of these domestic tasks to them.
DON'T USE 'GIRL' OR 'BOY'
AS A THREAT OR INSULT
This one’s pretty simple, but still we hear things like “You hit like a girl,” or “Don’t be such a boy!”. Saying things like that insinuates that femininity is inferior, or being masculine is wrong when you’re a girl, when we know these things to be untrue. Whoever you are, there’s nothing wrong with being feminine or masculine, and qualities like toughness shouldn’t be associated with gender in the first place.
CHALLENGE AND DISCUSS PREJUDICE WITH YOUR CHILD
If your child comes across media that for example, criticizes women for looking ‘unattractive’, or makes fun of men for being ‘weak’, have a conversation with your child about whether or not they felt that was okay. Take the time to explain to them why these mindsets should not be considered fair, or acceptable.
ADAPTED FROM DR. FINN MACKAY'S "RAISING CHILDREN: THE FEMINIST WAY."
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And there's more!
This isn't the end of the road. We know that whether you're a parent, guardian or someone with a child that's important to you, chances are, you're likely on the lookout for resources that can help you become a better caretaker. Introducing...
About Spectrum
Filled with meaningful thought pieces, activities for the family and exciting illustrations, Spectrum is a family-friendly quarterly dedicated to exploring what it means to raise children to grow free from the confines of gender stereotypes and expectations. That's a lot of words, but just to sum it up, the mindset behind Spectrum is super simple: Kids just want to have fun.
